The age-old question of who should pay the bill on a first date has reignited over a Reddit post.
A woman online posted about her first date to the platform, receiving 11,000 upvotes and sparking a heated debate about modern dating etiquette, red flags and the true cost of a shared meal. The 28-year-old woman took to the social media platform to share her story.
In it, she explained that she went on a date with a 30-year-old man. They ordered burgers and fries to share, and the man paid for the meal. In return, she offered to cover the tip. The situation seemed amicable, but the next morning, things took a sharp and unexpected turn.
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“This morning, I woke up to a Venmo request for $3.25 with the note ‘half the fries,'” she wrote. At first, she thought it was a joke, but the man was serious. She declined the request and texted him, calling the act petty. His response only added to her frustration, as he said she was “overreacting, that ‘it’s about fairness’ and ‘that’s just how he is.’ Now I feel turned off and honestly insulted.”
The Online Outrage and Red Flags
The post was quickly filled with comments from other users, most of whom agreed that the Venmo request was a major dating red flag. The most common response centered on the sheer absurdity of the amount.
One user wrote that while paying for one’s own meal is a great idea, the situation was “tacky” because it’s such a minimal amount of money.
“It’s three bucks,” they wrote. “It just shows how petty he is. Anyone with a brain knows that requesting three bucks back will 100 percent guarantee no future date. He’s telling you that the $3 is more valuable than your company.”
Another commenter shared a similar personal experience and linked the behavior to deeper issues.
“This happened to me on a first date, too,” they wrote. “I just wanted to share how often this type of situation happens where someone expects sex on a first date and gets petty when being rejected.”
A Warning About Toxic Behavior
The man’s justification for his actions—”that’s just how he is”—was also highlighted as a massive warning sign.
One user stated: “Red flag most definitely. Especially with his statement of ‘that’s just how I am.’ That statement should always have you running. It always comes with red flag behavior…People who use that statement are very committed to their toxic behavior traits and will always lie and manipulate to justify it.”
The comment section also offered some unconventional advice for the poster. One user, in a show of “matching petty,” suggested sending the man the money for the whole meal, with a public message on Venmo about the situation “Let all of his contacts see it,” they wrote. “I’ll match petty any day. If he wanted money, he should have taken it when you offered it.”
The post serves as a cautionary tale and has reignited the discussion around dating etiquette, financial expectations and the importance of recognizing subtle red flags early on.
Newsweek reached out to u/Be4rp4wt00 for comment via Reddit.
