An Instagram reel has sparked a heartfelt conversation about love and commitment as millennials.
In the clipSara Strueby, 31, and her husband, Matt, 35, shared their profound realization while witnessing friends marry in their 30s. The couple told Newsweek about their observations, which challenge conventional timelines and celebrate the depth of relationships forged later in life.
“Can we talk about that feeling when you’re watching two of your friends get married in their 30s and you don’t wonder if it will last. You know it will,” Sara captioned the video. “Because they’ve already proven ‘I will’ long before the ‘I do’s’ of today.”
@sarastrueby/Instagram
Sara elaborated on this eye-opening experience. While she and Matt themselves married young—Sara was 23 and Matt was 27—she expressed immense admiration for her friends’ journeys.
“Watching our friends get married in their 30s has been such an honor,” Sara said, “especially because many of them have already walked through so much.”
She noted the personal growth and challenges many have faced: “They’ve navigated heartbreak, built careers, lost themselves, found themselves, healed, grown—and in some cases, faced unimaginable hardships, like battling cancer or grieving the loss of a parent together before ever walking down the aisle. That kind of love changes how you see commitment.”
Reflecting on her own early marriage, Sara said that she adores her and Matt’s love story.
“I wouldn’t change a thing. Even though I was young, I owned a home, I was settled in my career and I’d met my person, so getting married felt like the next step,” Sara said.
While getting married young provided the couple many years of growing and learning together, Sara acknowledged some unique challenges of saying ‘I do’ in your 20s.
“We still had so much ‘becoming’ to do,” she said. “There were seasons that were messy and hard, because we were figuring out who we were while trying to hold onto each other. Your 20s are incredibly transformative, and we’ve seen firsthand how not every couple can grow together through that.”
Now, as a mother herself, Sara’s perspective on her daughters’ futures is less about timelines and more about freedom.
“I just hope they feel free,” she said; “free to take their time, to find themselves first, to build full lives before sharing them with someone else—if that’s what they choose.”
‘You Are Not Late to Your Own Life’
For those still waiting for their person, Sara’s advice is clear and empowering: “Pouring into yourself is the greatest investment you’ll ever make.”
She shared a story of a best friend who walked away from a long-term relationship in her late 20s that “was not right for her.” Despite the initial shock throughout their circle, a year later, her friend found profound happiness.
“She fell in love with a partner who adores her,” Sara said. “They’re perfectly matched in every way—and they just had their first baby. I can’t imagine if she hadn’t made the brave moves it took to get there.”
To any woman feeling “behind” in her 30s, Sara offered an affirmation: “You are not late to your own life,” she said. “Love that arrives after you’ve fully met yourself is not second place. There is something sacred about arriving to love already whole. And the love that meets you on the other side of your becoming? It’s rooted.”
Ultimately, Sara said she hopes her daughters understand that “love isn’t something to chase—it’s something to choose. And it’s never too late to choose it well.”
